Depo Shot

So my mother and I talked about being put on birth control and she says her mind would lay at peace knowing I got the shot. The only thing is - I’m terrified to gain weight. I’m vegan and workout regularly, but I had surgery not too long ago and lost almost all of my cardiovascular endurance! It’s hard getting back into running again after being out for a month. My boyfriend says that me gaining weight wouldn’t make him lose interest in me. I explained to him that I will be self conscious and the shot will most likely make my depression shoot through the roof. Actually, I told him this: “I am absolutely terrified of gaining weight and the possible depression that comes along with the shot. I’m scared that I’ll lose motivation to workout & eat healthy. I’m scared that I won’t be able to fit into my clothes in a few months.” He then told me, “Don’t take the shot then, we can wait. All of that isn’t worth having sex.”

It’s not that I’m scared he will leave me, I’m scared I’ll lose interest in myself. I’m scared that I’ll hate myself once again, creating a hole and burying myself in it. I love the way I look now, but I’m definitely scared of change. I know gaining weight isn’t a bad thing, but my mind tries to tell me otherwise sometimes.