Breakups are hard

This breakup has been quite hard. There's not one time that I don't think about him or see what he's posting and doing. When I do, i end up hurt. He's moved on so fast and it's just been 5 days that he broke up with me. I still can't forget everything that we've done together. I can't forget all those promises and all the times I hugged him and played with his hair. I can't forget all the pictures and videos we have together. Meanwhile to him it's all gone. I wanted to last a lifetime with this guy. He was the first guy I have ever loved this way. He's made me so happy and I love everything about him. But I see that he's not for me. It hurts because I can't force something to happen. All I'm wishing for is for him to realize what he had and to come back. First time we were together was for a year, he had been cheating on me with so many different girls. Blamed me why he was leaving but I didn't know that he had been cheating so I obv felt guilty with everything he told me. Next time around comes back 3 months later and we work things out. We lasted 9 months. It was hard sometimes because I couldn't trust him like before and I would have so many insecurities. We had problems but overall we managed to fix it. He would cry for me, beg and was always there. Whenever we would fight I would get so mad and say stupid stuff to him but I'd always try and make it up by showing him that I really loved him and do things for him that no one has ever done for him. He broke up with me cz of those problems. We had already talked face to face and I promised that I would change all of that and fix it. At first he was unsure because he didn't want to get hurt anymore but then said that he'll stay, he believes me and that he loves me. Next day we had an amazing day together. I did everything to show him that I was serious about being with him. That I loved him. He looked so happy and told me that he loves me so much. Next day tells me that he's gonna see a movie with this girl from school. So I felt so sad because he's never done that and like why would he do that. Goes to that movie spends the whole afternoon with her and breaks up with me saying that it's my fault that he's leaving because he doesn't want me to fix anything. That he wants is freedom. When truth was that he liked that girl, the one he went to the movies with. He had been staying late from school hanging out with her, talking to her like more than friends because he wanted to date her. When he shoulda respected me and our relationship. Next day he then takes that girl to his job when I was just there on Monday and even posts a video about her on his snap. It all made sense to me but he didn't have the balls to tell me. He wanted to wait to see if that girl was gonna give him a chance. She did and that's when he just left me.

Now he's trying to get with another different girl. I think he tried asking her for a relationship with her but she said no. However, It hurts so much because I would have never changed him for someone that's better looking or smarter than he was. He was everything I wanted and it sucks how he doesn't care anymore and forgot me so fast ☹️ sometimes I don't know how to cope with this, it's all so strange. I feel alone most of the time because I'd always be glued to him. We'd do everything together. We'd always talk and now its all gone