Okay so to start off, I really am lucky in the in-law department. I married into a really great family. That being said, my mother-in-law tends to be extremely opinionated. She lives in California and my husband and I just moved to Utah two months ago for cheaper living and because my family is here. A few weeks ago my mother-in-law came for a visit and stayed with us for a week. Maybe it’s in part due to being pregnant, but I had such a hard time dealing with all of her strong opinions about every little thing. For example, she went out and bought new decorations for our guest room and bedroom even though I already had it decorated the way I wanted it. She put down new rugs over the ones I had and then even took our things we had in one of the drawers so she could leave her toiletries there for whenever she’s here for a visit. I don’t have a huge issue with that, but it’s not just her room..we plan to have other guests use it as well. It also came up that I sometimes listen to a murder mystery podcast because I find it really freaky and interesting. (Kind of like watching a scary movie or reading a murder mystery book.) She told me that I need to stop listening to it and only listen to uplifting podcasts. It’s seriously just a silly hobby and it does not affect my mood or my baby! So you could say she really got under my skin during her visit.

Now to my dilemma (sorry this is so long). She has made comments about being here when the baby is born and staying with us. She never asked if we would like her there immediately and just started making plans. She even wanted to be in the room but I told her we wanted it to just be my husband and myself. Then she said “well as long as I’m there the first few days of her being born because that’s the most important time to bond”. My husband and I are the ones who need to bond with the baby, not her grandmother! I just know that her being there right away will put extra stress on me at a time where I’m trying to recover and adjust to life with a baby. I want that first week to be special and to feel like I can do things my way. How do I go about relaying this to her?? I know it’s going to upset her and that she feels she has the right to be there right away. My husband isn’t great with confrontation and even though he agrees with me, he doesn’t want to cause an issue. So I feel like it’s going to land on me to be the one to say something. Any advice??