This post may be long hope you read until the end.

Me and my husband been together for 7 years! we have 2 boys together he works and I'm a SAHM. Why because he told me he rather have me stay home with the boys make sure they learn, grow and he loves making a lot of money for us. Well my husband has been working at this second job its from 5pm-9pm Tuesday,Thursday,Friday,Saturday,And Sometimes Sunday. Friday-Sunday it closes at 10. One night me and my husband were arguing and he really hurt my feelings. I was 110 when I met him 2 kids later I'm 193. BTW yes I am working on my diet so I will be losing weight. He started off by calling me round, fat, nasty, and a bitch. He drinks so he becomes a huge dick and no I don't tolerate it I stick up for my self. Hell laugh when he calls me fat and says that's all I have to say because he knows it hurts. Something else felt so different that day I couldn't explain it. I decided to wait until he goes to sleep and check something out on his phone I had this huuuuuuge gut feeling something was wrong. What did I see in his blocked numbers a phone number. I tried looking it up first and it said our town so I said maybe one of his customers that he delivered to ( hes a pizza delivery man) I turned off the phone and something was like no that's not it its in his blocked folder. So I decided to call from my phone nobody answered I called from his phone but added *67 because I noticed that's the way he did it and a girl answered and said his name she was like J*&^%$ is that you? I said whos this. She comes back with an attitude and asks the same so I Said this is his wife. She quickly hangs up. I couldn't hold back but to wake him up and confront him. He told me I was lying there was no girl I'm probably making it up. But he was getting all paranoid. He still denied it after an hour until I broke down. He finally told me who it was. 5 months ago my husband was talking to a 18 yr old mind you my husband is 27. He met her when he was doing a delivery saved her number and found her on kik. They messaged each other and she send a picture of her in the shower and I found the picture in the Gmail we made for family to contact us etc. So he deleted kik stopped talking to her and he recently bumped into her and grabbed her number. Also she started working at his pizza job when she turned 19. So it all started to make sense he never held me at night anymore, we stopped having sex, he started dressing better for work, tired to change his appearance, and treating me like complete shit. I cried for hours we ended up going to sleep I wanted nothing to do with him just let me be sleep on the couch. When we woke up I went into a deep depression I wanted to die I hated my life I mean why me? He apologized he wrote the girl in front of me to never hit him up ever again. He ended up quitting the job to prove he will never step that low again he will do whatever it takes. He brung up therapy, and he wants to work on his anger. He gave me access to his phone, password to call log but that didn't matter right now I was so confused and hurt. A few days went by he was bringing me flowers, calling me all the time at his first job, active in sex I mean things changed. Well until today we got into an argument over my past when I was 15 stupidest convo ever I mean stupid. It got so bad that he started calling me the names again and locked me outside it was cold and pouring bad! I blew up why do this shit again why call me names what happened to the change. We calmed down he told our 5 yr old were paining pumpkins he set them up on the table, took the paint out and told me he forgot the paint brushes in the car that we got from Walmart what happened next he left! he took off. My son asked where daddy because we thought he went outside to get the brushes but nope we looked out he left. My son cried sat on the floor playing with a chip he dropped earlier telling me daddy always leaves us he doesn't love us anymore. I cried for hours. WE don't deserve this bullshit anytime hes mad he leaves us and we wont hear from him and he shuts off his phone. I feel so lost and just needed to vent. My heart breaks for my kids we have a 7 month old and a 5 yr old we have no car because the car is his I cant just leave and take my kids out for a bit I feel trapped and lonely.