I was raped when i was 12 but like many of you will understand I did not even begin to process it for 15 years. Finally, after a procedure for a miscarriage in which the doctor did not behave respectfully, my ptsd was triggered. Everything came back to me and I have been struggling to heal for two years now. Well today, I was back in that same ER as a visitor. Its a big, winding, twisting ER so even though I knew the room was somewhere near by, I didn't think I'd see it or recognize it. I was instantly stressed being there but stayed focused on my uncle and his broken optic floor. Then, the last dr to see him before we were discharged walked us around just two corners from his room to her exam room. I recognized the hallway as soon as I saw it. It stretched out before me like a movie scene. We passed the room where my exam took place and I could feel myself drifting then we got to her exam room, directly next to the bed I was in. Instantly my eyes well up, i can feel my heart beating faster, my head starts to spin, everything goes fuzzy and I lean against the wall then I'm going down. All I could see was a pink scrubs top, she's got me by the arm, she's talking to me, I'm hyperventilating and sobbing. "I have ptsd. Its a trigger. " I sputter "it's a trigger. Its a trigger" She and someone else get me back to my uncles room. (Thank goodness for labeled visitor badges.) The room floods with nurses. I can feel them staring at me. I hear a male voice "Do we have a room? Let's admit her. " I'm crying harder, I can barely get air in, I'm clutching my pregnant belly, "No. It'll pass." I finally get out. " no no it'll pass" A female nurses pushes herself into the room she tells them she's got this and she pulls the curtain so I have privacy and we are alone. (Later I find out that she was already off her shift. ) She holds both my hands in hers and walks me through some basic breathing. She starts on grounding techniques, getting me to answer questions and then she's telling me stories of her life and explaining her tattoos, all with beautiful meaning based in literature. For 30 mins or more she sat across from me, holding me, talking to me, until I too could talk. She shared her life with me so she could help me. And even though I know that I will struggle more than usual for a little while I feel so blessed to have added her to good memory pile. She hugged me before she left, when I was calm and recovered and said "You are stronger than what happened to you. You must remember that so you can tell others." And she was gone. I'm trying to sleep now but after such a crazy stressful day, it's hard and I really just wish I had her number. Some people are just so amazing and usually you don't get the chance to tell them how much they helped you. I hope she knows what she did for me. I hope karma rewards her.