Arguing with my unborn son
Me: *farts*
Tommy: *STABS WITH FOOT*
Me: Jesus what
Tommy: *waits*
Me: *farts*
Tommy: *STABS WITH FOOT*
Me: This is your fault, you know, that I fart like this
Tommy: *S T A B S with foot*
Me: ME FARTING ISN’T HURTING YOU. YOU CAN’T EVEN SMELL YET, YOU DON’T BREATHE OXYGEN *farts*
Tommy: *straight up shanks me in the rib with his ninja foot*
Me: YOU BREATHE FLUID
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