Why am I so grossed out?

Don’t get me wrong, being eaten out feels great, but the whole time I keep thinking “ ugh there is spit all over my vagina, I can’t wait to clean off” and it takes me a while to get off. And as soon as my boyfriend is done, I don’t even want to give him oral because I’m so grossed out by the thought of spit sitting on my vagina 😭😭 I also hate washing up at 3am 😑😑😑 anyone else have this issue?!