Just need to vent..

A year ago in December I found out my husband had had an affair. It’s not the first time he’s cheated but it’s the first time (that he’ll admit to) that he’s physically cheated.

At the time, I was pregnant with a surrogate baby so legally we couldn’t get a divorce.

I told him we could work on things until the baby was born and we would make a decision then.

I forgave him. Or I thought I had. I find myself thinking of it a lot of being upset by it. Some days are good for us but there’s a lot that reminds me that he was unfaithful

I’m thinking of asking him to go to marriage counseling. I don’t know if he will go for it but it’s the only thing I can think of that might save our marriage.

We’ve been together for 11 years and have 2 boys together... I’ve never even kissed anyone else. I’m not afraid to be alone but I am afraid to be without him.

I just really don’t know what to do..