It’s just never going to happen.

I need to get this out.

We’ve been trying for almost 2 years. Since a year ago I started caring for my husband’s grandparents. Their 2 children don’t live around here. Father in law lives in Montana and daughter (retired) lives 4 hours away.

I don’t work because it’s what my husband and I decided. So their kids put it on me to be the aid. I sacrificed time, money and much else to do everything for them. We’ve gone into debt because we paid for things that they needed. Their kids didn’t help us with anything. I gained weight this year from countless amounts of stress. Their daughter constantly tell me to do more and that what I was doing wasn’t enough. Oh so it okay for me to scrub urine soaked floors and you to come visit when you want to? Grandpa’s health kept getting worse. No one would listen to me, to us. In

September their daughter decided that it was time to be an adult and come here. Then she made my life more of a living hell. Told me I wasn’t needed and could peace out. That she would hire people who would take better care of them. Hello?! I’m not medical personal. I’m a human being. 😑 she texted my husband and I nonstop every day telling us every time “today’s gonna be the day!” “He’s dying. He’s not going to make till tomorrow” OR she would rush him to the hospital and wouldn’t tell us. We went on a much needed trip early October and found out on Facebook that he was in the hospital.

Every time he was sick I told, nay yelled, at them that he was having bladder infections. When they finally took him in to the hospital the last time he needed three bags of IV antibiotics to treat it and 5 bags of fluids. One week later he passed away in bed at the age of 91. I miss that wonderful man and feel like a failure. The funeral was filled with more stress. Their daughter deliberately excluded all the spouses from the obit. Our poor cousin’s wife was excluded but her son (the greatgrandson) wasn’t. We got this nice card from her in the mail at the funeral too.

She always compliments before being passive aggressive.

Now that he’s gone their daughter keeps causing drama. She’ll leave to go back home and text us telling us that it’s our duty to take care of grandma. Grandma is sad and that’s understandable but we can’t be there every single day. They were having an aid come in but now that grandpa is gone grandma decided the aid was too expensive. So now they’re all expecting me to take her place.

I just started feeling normal. I lost some weight from the stress going down and I thought now would be our chance for a baby. I want to cry every day. My husband keeps telling them that we’ll help but they can’t rely completely on us. I feel like I’m never gonna have a baby because I’m forced to take care of things others won’t.

Sorry I just really needed to vent that out.