Advice welcome

Okay so.. this may get long so I apologize. My husband and I met back in 2008, we have been thru A LOT! Living with friends and family to living in a hotel then getting our own apartment, townhome and now renting a house. We have a 20 month old son as well and are doing very well for ourselves according to the "American dream". But.. ever since we got married in 2015, had our son in 2017 things have went downhill. When we were younger in our earlier stages of our relationship we partied and I mean all the time, why not we didn't have any responsibility. After I got pregnant I thought things would change and they didn't. I spent almost every day and especially the weekends alone, talking toy belly telling my son j would never leave him and that it's always he and I. My husband has never stopped the partying. He drinks almost every weekend still. During the week we both work and spend a couple of hours with our son before it's time for him to go to bed so we don't get that much time together as a family. This year for mother's day I got nothing, I didn't get to go out and enjoy my birthday night like he did, yes he went out for MY birthday without me. I didn't even get anything for Christmas this past weekend. Now.. we have always argued, what couple doesn't right? I don't like it happening in front of our son so Everytime it happens I ask that we wait until he goes to bed or we are alone, this never happens. About a month or so ago we got into a heated argument which lead to him throwing our sons bread across the floor and him telling me he wanted to flip the kitchen table over on me. After that happened I told him if it happened again I was done and filing for divorce. We made up and was okay until last Friday. We went to stay with his dad because his dad was having Christmas the following day, how parents are divorced, well I went to bed with our son and my husband stayed up drinking with his dad til 230am. Our son woke up at about midnight and wouldn't go back to sleep. He gets back and we got into it even worse than last time he came at me in front of our son he didn't hit me but he threatened to. I took myself and our son and drove an hour home at 3am and left him at his dad's with no car. Now he wants us to try to make it work again. I'm torn because I want my son to have his mom and dad under one roof but I don't want him thinking that is acceptable. 10 years with this man and his anger is getting worse, the worst I've seen it and I honestly feel like one day he might actually beat me though he says he wouldn't and hasn't yet. But do I just keep giving chances in hopes that it will turn around and get better? Or do I file for divorce and move on to provide a happier life for my son? No I don't plan on keeping his son from him but I will be going for primary custody. And no I won't go to counseling as he already calls me a psycho b*** and says I am messed up in the head so I don't need anything hindering what the future might hold.