Is it..?

Does depression bave to be consistent or can it come in spurts? Because sometimes I just feel really sad and I just hate myself and I cry and it'll go on for like 6 hours, usually in the evening or at night. What goes through my mind at these times is usually "How do I kill myself without losing my life, relationships, and everything I worked for?" or "I wish I could switch into autopilot." But I'm also energetic and kinda peppy? Is it still depression?