Help I’m so lost has anyone gone thru

So much abuse in there life and are just scared to death about how there life is going to turn out . I don’t want people to know who I am because I’m embarrassed 😞 of people telling me I told you so he was no good for you I left the father of my kids because he physically beat me treated me like I was the worst ! Got into a realationship maybe 3 years later with someone amazing . Thought maybe he will make me change ! My way of viewing men . 2 years have passed and it just has got worst . The last share of months ever sense I got pregnant & it’s not physical abuse but it’s mental emotional abuse and it hurts more then the actual bruises.. of getting physically beaten on . I much rather feel that pain then feel what I’m feeling inside right now a sense of hopelessness. I feel like I’m failing my 2 kids & my unborn son . He kicked me out and told me to leave I have no were to go . My 2 kids are with there grandma because of a ongoing Dcfs case . Last week I got some amazing news that I would probably be getting them back in the next court hearing on wensday & my heart was so happy. I went about cleaning my whole room today and moving things around sense I ordered a new bed set for the kids . For when they come home . & he was like leave this isn’t your home you have nothing .. And I’m currently 7 months pregnant . And I’m so scared .. I’m laying in my room crying wondering were I went wrong . I know I have done my share of wrong . But why 😭😩 i just need a little bit of hope .