Need help

I can't do this anymore.I can't do anything right, my grades have gone to shit, I had a great best friend who now hates me when I did nothing to her, she always skips class to go smoke weed with her friends, and has better grades than me, I've been pushing people away, I was self harming, my bf and friends are worried about me, I need help but I can't ask for it. I feel so fucking stuck and if I can last a day without crying it's a miracle. I hate my life rn, I'm not suicidal but I just want to stop hurting so much.