Anyone?

I have a 9 year old daughter from an ex and I’m due in July with my husband’s first biological child. My daughter has always just been a convenience to my ex. If he had crap going on in his life he wouldn’t see or call her for a few months, then he’d get her every other weekend for awhile, then it’d start all over again. She hasn’t seen him since Christmas eve when she told his wife that he was cheating on her. My daughter doesn’t want anything to do with her bio dad. He’s called her and she tells him she doesn’t want to talk to him and hangs up on him. The last time he text me to talk to her was February 8 she made a video telling him that she doesn’t want him in her life and that my husband is more of a dad to her than he’ll ever be. We are taking her to family counseling because she didn’t want to go alone.

My husband and I have almost been married for 3 years. Him and my daughter have an amazing bond. She calls him daddy, he treats her just like she is his and tells everyone she is his daughter. I’ve never heard him tell anyone that she’s his stepdaughter. He’s went to every soccer game, every swimming lesson, every school program she has had since we’ve became a family. He’s truly an amazing man. He includes her in everything.

I’m so scared his mother and stepdad are going to treat my daughter differently once this baby is born. We live 3 hours away from them and my parents and we visit frequently. Sometimes when we come in they’re to busy to see us. It’s been almost 2 years since they’ve stayed the night at our house, yet they go to my husband’s sibling’s home that’s more than 13 hours away every 3 months. Yesterday mil informed us that she’ll be coming to our house way more once baby is born.

A few small things have happened or been said that I feel are going to lead to bigger problems. One thing I want to mention since this is getting so long is right after we got married she talked to my daughter to decide on what my daughter would call her and her husband. They agreed on names but now to DH’s siblings dogs and even our dogs she refers to herself as another name. Well I’ll be the first to let her know all my children are going to call her what my daughter and her decided on.I’m just freaking out and want to be able to let her know that she or anyone else will not be showing a difference in my children. Has anyone else dealt with this?

We pretty much have a good relationship. She has always texted me every now and then asking how we are and she still does that. She only FaceTimes my husband/us about once a month. She’s never tried taking my mom’s place. She has always been pretty good to our daughter. I just don’t want drama or her treating my babies differently.