Does my mother hate me

So ever since my son was born she loved to have him, and when he got a little older she diddled away.

And she always says well find someone else to have him this that because she knows it will hurt, then a week ago I started going for jogs and walks with a friend to help with my depression.

And she came out and say your not aloud a life when you have children, bearing in mind I work, pay Bill's, look after my little one I have no time for anything else, but also she's telling my sister that I'm not aloud a life .

But my sister has 4 kids and she has her children for about 5 days 2 and 3 at a time, and she complains about having mine for 1 night, and I've also been trying for another baby and she's telling her that if I have another baby I have to quit my job, and she wouldn't look after it..

To me it sounds like she doesn't like me and that's ok... but I don't want my son to get in the middle of it or use him as a weapon.

What should I do please need advice