This wait is agonising! 💔

I had my anomaly scan on 12th March (22+1) baby measured:

Abdominal circumference:145.8mm (20+0)

Cerebellum: 22mm (22+0)

Head circumference: 176.2mm (20+1)

Femur: 31.2mm (19+5)

Ventricle atrium: 6.7mm

Nuchal fold: 4.9mm

Told they couldn't complete the scan and that baby was measuring in the lower 10th percentile.

I was booked in for another scan on the 18th.

To be told they couldn't get a proper view of the 3vv and 3vt of the heart and that she was going to refer me to the FMU. She also wasn't happy that from the views she got she wasnt happy with the shape of the baby's heart and couldn't distinguish it's 'v-shape' that a heart should have.

I did also alert them of my Dad's heart defect.

I'm barely sleeping, I'm constantly trying pick away at my scan pics and comparing to those on google and those with DS or other chromosomal disorders and it's sending me crazy with worry.

My screening results were:

1:38 000 for down syndrome

1:340 for Edward syndrome

1:739 for Patau syndrome

I'm sat thinking my baby has one of the above.

I've made sure I've had my prenatals and upped my fruit and veg intake in the hope baby has grown when I attend my FMU appt on weds.

I feel like the man upstairs hates me!

In the past 18months, I've had a breakdown of my marriage, a car crash, an abusive relationship due to my vulnerability, my job wasn't renewed, working with a debt company as im struggling to keep my head above water, total lack of work on the supply route, no joy with interviews either. I've had enough. Thought this baby was a blessing and would help me to see light at the end of the tunnel, but all it seems is like this isn't meant to be either.

It's breaking my heart. I don't know how much bad luck I can take 💔