Delayed Grieving?

I had an abortion just under a year ago. It was 100% the right decision. My boyfriend and I are in university, when we’re in our home towns we live two hours away. We have no money. So at the time, although I cried when I found out, I never even considered keeping the baby.

My boyfriend grieved a lot and was upset for months. While I was very level headed about it and almost dissociated myself from what was happening.

But recently i’ve found myself crying endlessly about what could’ve been etc. I don’t want to bring it up to him because of how hard he found it, but we kept it very private and so there’s no one I can speak to and i’m finding it so hard.

I was wondering if anyone had any advice.