Not sure what to do..

Been with my boyfriend for year and some months. I feel like I’m a god awful girlfriend towards him because we haven’t had sex yet. Reason being is because I haven’t had sex yet. I feel so comfortable with him and wanting to loose it to him. Thing is every time we get close to having sex I have major panic attacks because I’m never allowed to be on birth control due them screwing up my cycles and causing other health issues. He’s understandable about me being a virgin and reason why I am but ugh I feel like a shitty girlfriend to him😕