Telling husband his family stresses you?

Question

So I'm a first time mom, LO is 7 weeks old. Up until 6 weeks I struggled pretty bad with PPD but I'm starting to feel better. My husband's family lives close and likes to get together for dinner every couple of weeks. The issue is that my sister in law has 5 kids under 8. I love them to death but they are wild and stress me out. Now that we have a baby I have found they stress me out even worse. They are all in his face , throwing balls around, screaming, fighting, etc and I just kind of sit there in my internal panic. Sunday is my first mother's day and I was hoping to do something with just my little family but as I suspected, my husband's family wants to get together. How do I tell my husband I want this one day to myself? Do I tell him his sister's kids totally stress me out or do I bite my tongue? I love my in-laws and certainly don't want to make a thing out of it, I just don't want to be in anxious misery when it's my mother's day too. I'm so torn. I don't want to upset anyone.

Answer

Talk to your husband— he may be able to buffer for you if you are at the event and feel stressed. But it’s good for him to know, he’s your partner.

Answer

just tell him! closed mouths don’t get fed girly! it might not be an easy conversation but i’d rather be uncomfortable in a conversation for a few minutes than put myself through something i knew i didn’t want to go through if i just would’ve said something. learned this years ago and it’s been a god sent. you don’t need to please everyone! do what’s best for you and your family right now 😊

Answer

You do need to relax a little. The kids are just being kids, but it’s how you choose to react that makes all the difference.
Next step is to put your bub in a Baby Carrier and that way you’ll know they’ll be safe around the other kids. It also stops germs from being passed around to your baby because it limits other people holding them. Especially if the baby is under 8 weeks old and hasn’t had all of their immunisations yet.
Finally, after being a Mum for 13 years I’ve worked out that you don’t truly get a Mother’s Day until you’re a Grandma. We’ve come up with a tradition that we celebrate our Mother’s and Fathers Day on the Saturday and the Sunday is for celebrating with the Grandparents. 
If there is one thing I’ve worked out as a parent, it’s Don’t get Fed up with something that can be helped by changing things up a little. Your life as a parent will have many compromises, some in your favour, some not. Don’t try to win them all.

Answer

You be honest about it.

Answer

It’s your first mother’s day and you just had a baby. I would tell hubby that you just want to celebrate you three and ask him to excuse you after a certain amount of time during visits (an hour)? Drive separately and he can stay for 3 hours or whatnot. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Answer

I personally would not keep my husband from his mother on Mother’s Day without it being an advanced notice type thing.  The thing about this particular holiday is that many generations of the same family celebrate it.  At this point in time you would be springing it on his mom that he won’t be there with her new grandchild on a day she expected to get to see them.

Answer

I would just tell him that you want to spend quality time with him and the baby on that day. You both need to spend time together as a family, sure his family has other things in mind, but it’s best to put your little one first. Mother’s Day is the day you either want to spend time with the baby and hubs, or just have ‘me’ time. I can’t really relate as I am not a mother, but I can sense the idea of how that could feel. I’ve asked my bf if we could go on a date as we rarely go on a date, as our last date was a few days before my father passed, and ever since then, he was told to babysit his siblings (ages 16,15,13, and 9) and he’s 21, trying to save for a place of our own. It’s been hard for us to even go out on a simple date, because his family forces him to babysit and buy them food all the time while they go out on their dates. I gathered up the courage and told him that I wanted to go on another date. Finally, a few days ago, we went in one and had a blast. It’s all about asking, yes it’s a bit nerve wracking as you’re not too sure what to say, but just go with what you truly feel that’s right to say. Tell him that all you need on Mother’s Day is just him and your child. I wish you the best of luck🤞

Telling husband his family stresses you?

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