Trying to move out with my bf, controlling parent conflict

I am 21 years old about to graduate college and I have a job near my college which is an hour from home. I have been with my boyfriend for 3+ years and he has a job in the area too. We decided to move in together and planned and did some budgeting. The only thing is my family. All my life my dad has been controlling and I’ve wanted to leave this house forever which is also why I went to school so far away. The way he is towards my mom and everybody in the house is mentally and emotionally draining. Because in my culture “divorce is not an option” my mom just stays and takes it. But I am too angry and stubborn to live that life.

The reason I’m posting this is because they know I plan to move with my boyfriend and my dad is mad about it and saying he should ask him first. He also says they don’t know his family which is his fault because during this past 3 years he has never made an effort to get to even know my bf let alone his family. Also I’m getting all this information about what he thinks from my mom who is being used as his puppet. Now my mom is begging me to just get a place by myself. But I refuse to let him control my life anymore even if my mom lets him that’s just something I can’t do anymore. I still wanna be respectful and let him know whether he likes it or not I’m moving in with my bf. I don’t wanna cause drama for my mom but I honestly do not give a shit what he thinks I should do. I will be going home this weekend to face this issue so I wanted to see if anyone has any advice on how I should go about this. Anything will be helpful