Have you ever asked yourself if it's just not meant to be?

When we made the decision to start trying, I never imagined 6 months later, I'd be laying in bed wondering why I keep getting negatives when almost literally every single person I know is running around pregnant. I just found out last week that one of my husbands friends is pregnant and she doesn't even have a boyfriend or anything! We have a nice house, a nice car, he has a sreasy income, I can be a SAHM. Why her and not us? I admit, I lost it. I was pissed and crying and I felt bad after but seriously!? Ugh. The chemical last month didn't help. I was absolutely shattered when I got the positive and then watched them fade over the next couple days/tests. I can't help but feel like for some reason we just aren't mean to be parents right now even tho we feel like we are. Idk. Thinking about continuing with cycle 6 then stopping if it doesn't happen. I want to focus on going to the gym and getting more in shape for a little while and hopefully that'll help for future TTC. Idk what to do. I just know I want a baby but I'm tired of being heartbroken already and it's only been 6 months. Idk how you 1-10 year couples do it but I truly feel for you and hope you get your 🌈!