The Evil Green Monster- news friends are pregnant

I found out about a month ago that my husband and I miscarried. It was devastating.  It still is devastating, but at least I can go throughout my day without feeling like I'm about to cry. However, I've found that learning that my friends and co-workers are getting pregnant (some weren't even trying 😤) just brings back all of those depressing memories. The worst was finding out that my friend has the same due date that I had. A little piece of me wanted to scream. I hate being "that girl" who can't be happy for others so I put on a fake smile. It hurts and it sucks but I feel like I can't shake the feeling that I'm being punished for something. At the same time I feel like I'm the worst friend ever. 
Here's to hoping the Green Monster (aka envy) finds someone else to haunt.