Is this normal?

I gave birth 10 months ago & for the last 10 months, I have felt this way. I thought it was just something that goes away, but it hasn’t and it can be too much at times.

My anxiety is a 100 most of the time. I can’t control & it does affect my life, every day. Also, it’s affecting my relationship, my husband knows I don’t have any control over it so he does understand.

My sex drive is non existent. I hate sex. I hate kissing. I hate being touched. I hate being called beautiful because I think I’m ugly now. It all just irritates me. I try not to be rude to my husband, he knows I can’t help it. I apologize all the time & I don’t know why I’m feeling this way. I feel like I have a hormonal imbalance or something..

With that being said, I’m constantly on edge. I’m so irritable. I have to walk away from my husband because I get so mad. He’s honestly not even doing anything wrong. He picks on me, compliments me ect. Things that never used to bother me.

Im not this way towards my son, im only this way towards every day life and other people. Im so attached to my son, I never let him leave my side. He’s always with me 24/7. I love being around him so much.

I called my doctors office, well my obgyn. The nurse is going to ask her if she wants to see me or to tell me i need to go to a family doctor. Which I hope not, because my obgyn knows how I was through my pregnancy and she will be the only person who truly understands because she seen some of my anxiety.

Any of you feel this way? I hate it 😭

I’m not on birth control, I’ve never taken it.

I’m not on medication.

I’m not breastfeeding