First comes marriage, then comes..?

Question

Hi everyone!

My wife and I started TTC this month and when I tell people that we are trying, we face quite a bit of judgment. Surprisingly, the judgment isn't based on our same-sex relationship. Instead, people say things like, "Have you bought a house yet?" or "You really should purchase a house before you get pregnant".

For some context, my wife and I currently live with a roommate in a house that he purchased. I work full time and we are saving up for a down payment on a house. That being said, I do not personally think that it is super important to buy a house before we have a baby, especially because we have a great arrangement right now.

What are your opinions? Should people purchase a house before they get pregnant/have a baby?

Answer

I don't think you need a buy a house before baby but I do think having your own place (be that rented or bought, personal preference) makes it a bit easier. Things like baby proofing etc I think are easier when it's your own place and you can do what you want in it but if your roommate is happy to have a baby/child around then do what's right for you honey. It's not so bad when baby is small, they don't need much but when they are a bit older and the solid food and exploring everything in sighlht starts, that's when worrying about messing up someone else's home might be more of a worry. 
There's no "you should do this before baby". As long as baby is happy, loved and provided for that's the most important thing. Everything else is just about making things easier and more comfortable. 
Best of luck

Answer

No! Plain and simple. A mortgage is just another debt and not every one can afford a home. Home is where u make it and if u guys r ready then go for it! 😉 Remember just like this those r just their opinions. They r like asses, everyone has one! 🤣

Answer

How does the roommate feel about a baby screaming all hours of the night taking over his house though would be my concern with it.

Answer

Ideally, yes.  If your roommate is OK for you to bring a baby home then that’s great. A baby 100% changes the dynamic of a household with nightly feedings, crying, baby stuff everywhere. It just seems to be an easier transition when it’s your house, your family. I’d definitely have a goal date to purchase your own house.

Answer

This is part of why I don’t tell people if/when we are trying. 
Live your life!! Do what you and your wife want 😊
Good luck and lots of baby dust to the two of you!

Answer

In this market?! Hell no! Why spend so much extra on a house and mortgage? Our humble little 3 bedroom house just appraised at over half a mil and we built it for 180k and it’s really nothing special. I’d be livid if we were house shopping right now. nobody should be crazy enough to spend 600k on a 1900 sq ft house with no special features.

Answer

We owned a house and sold it because it makes more sense for us to rent right now. We are actually saving and planning to buy a little camp on a lake or something and continue to rent our house. We also aren't married, and just had a baby. This is the correct order of things for us, it may be different for others. As long as you've thought it through and are on the same page, it doesn't matter at all.

Answer

Purchasing a house is absolutely not necessary to have a baby. My husband and I wanted to go that path, but it just didn’t work for us at this time. So we rented a bigger house. I know some people who never purchased a house. That doesn’t determine ultimate success in life.

Answer

It’s a personal choice. You don’t have to have a house to have a baby. A baby isn’t going to care if it’s a house or apartment. It’s when they get older and it’s time to make noise and run away.

Answer

I was asked the same question got married and had baby in a year, baby is 5 months old and we bought a flat now. You can buy house whenever you want but you have baby when you're blessed. I know someone who has bought house and everything still waiting for a baby and is been 5 years now 🤷🏼‍♀️

First comes marriage, then comes..?

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