Is it bad that my husband and I haven’t had sex in about 4 years and are not physical in any way? He says he’s still happy, but I’m like I want to have sex and he gets upset when I bring it up.

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Sex isn’t everything, but it’s still something. I personally wouldn’t be able to survive my marriage without sex/intimacy. It’s an important factor in my marriage

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I would have BEEN divorced his ass!!! I'm a sexual person so that wouldn't fly with me

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It's only bad if you are dissatisfied

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I think it’s worth considering couples therapy if he’s having difficulty opening up about it. Even if he doesn’t want to discuss it, he needs to know how it’s effecting you & help with a solution. I’ve been through droughts with my husband & I know how we crave intimacy & that kind of connection to our partners. It hurts to feel undesired & distanced from them. There are also reasons that can lead to a lull in sex drive such as hormones, depression, stress, weight gain, health, and even if the problem is corrected sometimes old habits & routines remain until you actively try to make an effort to bring your sex back to life. I know it’s been a loooong time but be patient & try to approach the issue gently, guys can be sensitive about the topic more than we realize sometimes.

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Is a low testosterone/ desire thing? If so an endocrinologist can test his hormone levels.

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I think sometimes it’s easy to stay in our comfort zone. Do something special to wake up your marriage! Everyone gets stuck in a rut from time to time.

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Doesn’t seem healthy

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You should really talk to him about it, maybe low sex drive? Maybe cheating? Or maybe his sexuality? Who knows. He might be upset when you bring this up but if he isn’t interested than there has to be a reason. Sex isn’t the most important factor in marriage but it is a big part of it and if my husband hadn’t had sex with me within 4 years, I would definitely have a problem with it.

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He’s probably cheating on you. Sex isn’t everything but 4 years?!

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Maybe I’m reaching, but have you had a talk about sexuality? If not that, does he have ED?

Is it bad that my husband and I haven’t had sex in about 4 years and are not physical in any way? He says he’s still happy, but I’m like I want to have sex and he gets upset when I bring it up.

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