I had a traumatic labor today.. maybe trigger warning?

I gave birth to the most beautiful baby boy today. He’s so perfect and I love him so much. The labor was intense. And I mean intense. I was in labor for around 24 hours but the last 5 hours were spent pushing with everything I had. If he hadn’t been so low and stuck behind my pelvic bone then they would have done a C-section after a while. Finally the got him out with the most excruciating pain I’ve ever felt. They say once you see your baby your forget the pain. I don’t forget the pain at all, I remember every detail of it. I just know that looking at him made it worth it. But then things got complicated..

my placenta wouldn’t come out so my dr had to stick her whole hand and wrist up there and retrieve it and then it came out in pieces. Something was wrong so they rushed me to a D and C. Once I was under and they went in they discovered the placenta had grown into the uterine wall. They scraped out as much as they could but if they scraped any more they could thin the uterine wall too much or rupture it and I’d need a hysterectomy. So as of right now I have pieces still inside me and a fluid filled balloon in there to help control the bleeding. Because of this however, I won’t ever be able to have another child. The risk could be death. The next placenta could latch onto the old one or grow through the thinned uterine wall and grow onto a nearby vital organ. Being told you can never have another child was really tough for me to hear and I don’t know how to handle it. I’m so thankful for the beautiful joy I have and holding him is like the best high I can ever experience but when the hormones settle and life becomes its new normal I’m afraid of how I’ll revisit this news and how I’ll handle it. Sorry for the long post. I just needed to talk about it I guess.

4.8k views • 292 upvotes • 26 comments

COMMENT (26)

Je

Posted at
You still have your uterus! Miracles happen. Yes, having another child after this would be a true high risk pregnancy, but it's not impossible. It's called Placenta accreta. I heard a lot about it when Kim Kardashian had it with her first pregnancy... and again with her second pregnancy! The second time it caused a hole in her uterus. That's when she started using a surrogate. Just thought you should know that. Anyway. Congrats on your son. He's beautiful!!

Ti

Tiffany • Aug 5, 2019
I didn’t know too

Ma

Marissa • Aug 3, 2019
Thank you I didn’t know about her story! That gives me a little hope.

🦋

Posted at
The good thing is that both of y'all made it out safely. God is good, healing upon you..

Ca

Posted at
I would highly recommend getting a second opinion. If someone couldn’t have a second pregnancy after a thin uterus then the 1/3 of birthing women who have c-sections would be told not to get pregnant again. This is a diagnosis that can be watched for and tracked as well as dealt with in a positive manner. You are more likely to develop it again, but not a for sure thing. If you did they would schedule a c-section as they should have caught and scheduled with the first. You can look up ACOG online and they can tell you actual doctor recommendations on what protocol is I. These situations.

Ma

Marissa • Aug 4, 2019
I will get a second opinion but it’s more due to the fact they can’t remove the entire placenta without rupturing my uterus. I had 3 high risk surgeons attempt to figure out a solution yesterday and today. We’re also going to reassess in 2 weeks and in 6 months. 🤞🏻

Ga

Posted at
I’m sorry you went through this, something similar happened to me 5 years ago, balloon and everything else. The good news is that looks like you didn’t need a hysterectomy, even weak your uterus is still in place. Ask your doctors if the scarring could be removed in a future operative hysteroscopy (a different procedure). It took us a long while, but thankfully we were able to conceive again, and there are precautions doctors can take knowing your medical history. Good luck mama! There are other options as well and you have a beautiful baby now to care for.

Ma

Marissa • Aug 4, 2019
Thank you so much for your kind words. I’m so glad it worked out for you. The doctors are taking another look in two weeks and again in 6 months to see where we can go from there.

Su

Posted at
I've not been in your situation. However, we struggled with infertility for a long time and looked into medical interventions before we conceived. It's hard to let.go of control but if we are only blessed with one amazing kid we are okay with it. Your emotions are raw and valid, but you have an amazing child. Be he your only, or only biological please dont be distressed so soon. Hes the best thing that ever happened to you.

Mo

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That is terrible! So glad you and your baby are safe.

Am

Posted at
My friend had a c-section and part of her placenta had grown into the wall. After she left the hospital she started to swell up and she was hemorrhaging inside. She had two blood transfusions and lived but was told she could never have another baby as well. It’s hard to hear! I’m sorry! My friend’s daughter is 10yrs old now and they are very happy!

Sa

Posted at
I almost never respond on this app but your story reminded me so much of my own journey. I’m so sorry for your birth experience. I had a very similar experience that you had: labor 24 hours, pushed for 3.5, baby also stuck, had to use forceps to get him out, had to go in and pull out placenta, and had the balloon to stop the bleeding, blood transfusion. It was very traumatic and not what I ever expected to happen. If I could give one piece of advice it would be to talk about it to someone and don’t feel ashamed about it. It was out of your control. It’s okay to be angry, and sad, and grieve the delivery that you had as well as the one you didn’t. Too many times I feel like mom’s are shamed into keeping their emotions quiet but in retrospect I personally regret not talking to someone about how I was feeling. You do have a beautiful baby to be thankful for but I can also tell you that you are not wrong for grieving the possibility of no future children. It’s hard to judge someone when you have not walked in their shoes. I pray you find the support and comfort that you are seeking. 🥰 much love from a fellow mom.

🦄

Posted at
I had placenta acreda too. Nobody told me I couldn’t have another but my delivery too was so traumatic that I don’t think I will have another. Which is kinda sad. It’s taken months to accept that it’s not a good idea for me to have a second child. I understand that confusion and pain, but just give yourself time to figure out all the complicated feelings that come with that.

Ka

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Oh mama I am so sorry your birth was so terrible and that you can’t have any more biological children. I’m sure your heart is heavy today.