What would you do?

So I’ve been unemployed since May. I’m on unemployment. I have turned down about 5 or so jobs because of my anxiety.

Yes I am seeing dr/ psychiatrists/ therapist.

I am supposed to start a new job tomorrow.

But my anxiety is so bad. I’m so scared to be somewhere by myself. Not because of the “starting a new place” fear but because of ptsd and anxiety. I’m anxious about going somewhere and being killed, or taken. It’s so bad that I had an interview for a dentist and I had to have someone take me to my interview and watch me from outside because I thought they would sedate me and keep me and sell me for human trafficking.

I don’t want to miss out on an opportunity for this other job, but as it gets closer to tomorrow I’m getting so scared and anxious.

I know once I get there everything should be ok, but it’s the thought of leaving my house everyday and these same thoughts occurring. I’ve asked some people what to do and everyone just says to take it and if you can’t handle then quit but then I lose out on unemployment.

I was ok at my pervious job, but now I’m not.

Some other things that my anxiety cripples time with is showering. I can’t stand feeling the water on me. I can’t handle being in the shower by myself with the water on me for that period of time.

I can’t wear certain fabric cause it makes me feel anxious.

I just don’t know what to do. I’m beating myself up over this. I need to work to make more money than unemployment, but I just can fathom going to this new job by myself. What if someone follows me to my car and takes me?

Please some words of wisdom or some advice. Maybe hearing someone say “take that job you’ll be ok” or “don’t take the job and focus on yourself and better your mind, something else will come along” idk.

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