Can someone calm my nerves about giving birth? 😩

Question

I’m 36 weeks pregnant with my first baby and for the past week I’ve been having non stop anxiety about labor/delivery. Like my anxiety attacks have gotten so bad I can’t eat that much, I cry, I feel sick, and I barely sleep at night I’m stressing so much and I know that isn’t healthy for my baby. 
Can someone please tell me a happy or easy or quick birth story to help calm me down? Like was it “easier” than you thought? Am I stressing for nothing? 
Please help. 😩 (no judgement please)

Answer

You just have to realize, thousands of women a day do this. Yeah, sometimes it sucks oh, but you know what? Then it's over, and you have your baby, and trust me, you forget anything that happens that is less than ideal. My first delivery was golden, my second, eight months ago, was horrific. And I would do the second labor times ten all over again to have another baby.

Answer

First of all, take a breath and realize that your body is literally made to do this. 
I honestly thought pregnancy was much worse than labor and delivery. I had an epidural, and I didn’t even feel it get placed. I did not tear, and the pushing phase was short, and my son was healthy. I had great nurses that genuinely seemed to care. Yea contractions hurt and were intense before I got the epidural, but again, it’s nothing you can’t handle. 
I’m pregnant again, so it must not be too bad. 😉 but seriously, I’m 11 weeks with #2, and again, I really think pregnancy is worse. It’s like 40 weeks of torture for me.

Answer

One main advise that I will give you is that do the breathing technique a lot it really helps and don’t push unless they tell you when too just keep breathing in and out and you will be fine 😊

Answer

For me, the worst part of having a baby was the recovery (but don't let that scare you, it still wasn't that bad) followed by pregnancy, and then labor. Labor really wasn't bad. It was tiring, but really it is a very natural process. It's something your body just knows how to do, it's in our nature to give birth. 
Movies and media have also made labor look a lot worse than it is. In the majority of cases, it's not endless screaming and uncontrollable pain. I had a med-free labor, and I wouldn't say it was painful. It is something strong that takes over your whole body. It's like every muscle in your body is pulled into the contraction, including your mind. But it isn't painful. Just strong, I mostly wished I could sleep. The need for sleep was the one thing that made the epidural seem tempting to me. 
And once my baby was born, I had the most wonderful feeling. It was like my whole body let out a huge sigh of relief. Everything relaxed, and I knew I was done, I had done it. I had my baby, and he came out crying the most wonderful cry. As he was handed to me, he pooped all over my arm, and I wasn't even mad 😂 It was amazing. 
And when I say the recovery was bad, and not to let that scare you, I mean it. I think my recovery was a little worse than most, I tore a good bit (don't worry, I hardly felt it. I knew it was happening, but my mind was in a different place, in a way I didn't even care) and I also hemorrhaged immediately after having him, which I think is why I had such a hard recovery. My body just had a lot of blood loss to make up for, while not sleeping because of having a newborn. And hemorrhage happens in less than 1% of births, so I wouldn't stress about that either. 
When you hear women say that labor is a beautiful thing, it's because it is. Movies just make it seem more dramatic for the sake of being dramatic, and the horror stories get more attention than the good ones because the horror stories are more rare. You'll be just fine, and you'll be so happy to hold your baby in your arms ❤

Answer

Oh my gosh I remember struggling so hard to find peace and comfort before delivering my daughter. It’s such an unknown, that it consumes you. Don’t allow that to happen. Even if you wanted, your body will give birth- without your consent.. lol. That baby is coming out no matter what. And it’s perfectly fine to let go and let your body handle what it needs to do. Let your body guide you. What helped me was reading and watching birthing stories/videos. I started to binge watch labor and birth vlogs. You have to remind yourself that this is extremely human of us. It’s not going to last forever. And the more you relax, the better your labor experience will be. Get more education on techniques, watch positive birth videos, read different blogs and lean about other methods to labor in.. start to familiarize yourself with the whole process to the point of knowing it like the back of your wrist. Anxiety stems from a loss in control, and because birth is so random- we lose all control.. at least control your thoughts and find comfort with the process. 
I suffer from anxiety and ocd also ❤️

Answer

I mean, some people have like 10 kids and multiple people have more than 1 so it obviously wasnt bad enough for them to not want to have anymore after their first lol

Answer

I got an epidural but the contractions before the epidural for me just felt like really bad period cramps. When I was actually pushing I surprisingly was in absolutely no pain, and this is after the epidural had worn off a bit. I literally remember thinking how insane it was that the pushing part for me didn’t hurt at all. I was terrified just like you, but you got this.

Answer

Labor for me was simple and fast. I did get an epidural both times. Obviously, it’s not like that for everyone. I was induced both times as well. I wish you luck! Just remember our bodies are made for this.

Answer

The best thing you can do for your fear is to educate yourself. Read ina mays guide to childbirth. Another good book is called “birth without fear”. Trust that your body was made to do this. Read into hypnobirthing. Learn coping mechanisms for the contractions. I had two homebirths and while I can’t say it was painless, it wasn’t that bad and it’s totally worth it!

Answer

your not alone. I’m also a first time mom and 35 weeks and I fear labor so badly. Like i almost don’t want to do it but I have no choice lol. I’m just preparing my mind mentally for all of the pain.

Can someone calm my nerves about giving birth? 😩

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