I don’t know what to do…

So a little back story I had my rainbow baby on May 8th this year. It was a tough pregnancy because I was sick all day every day and then the last few weeks were the hardest because I ended up with the flu and then developed preeclampsia. Let alone got induced at 39 wks which I never want to do again because it was very uncomfortable.

Ok so let’s go to now my daughter is about to be 5 months old in less than a week. Let alone I just found out I was pregnant again on Sunday, and going by the ultrasound done they are saying 12 wks and 3 days now it’s 12 wks and 6 days today. Anyways I know it can happen really quick after giving birth which is what happened to me. And I’m not young because I’m 34 so I don’t need anyone bashing me thinking I’m super young. I just am very uncertain if at the moment if I even want to keep it. I know I’m emotional. I get that but I’m very undecided if I want to keep it or not now. I literally had no clue I was pregnant besides not having a period. No other symptoms like I had with my daughter. I’ve not been sick nor any of the other symptoms you usually have. I just need some emotional support. My fiancé is there for me but he just doesn’t understand and he’s like super excited. I’m not. Same with some of his immediate family. I haven’t even told anyone in my family because I feel ashamed.