Mother-in-law ⛔️

Hi

I am 17 weeks pregnant. My partner recently told his mum we are having a baby. The relationship is an odd one between me and the mother in law. I am people pleaser and I’ve always tried to connect with his mum but she blames me for he strained relationship with her son. She doesn’t know I’m the one who buys the gifts for Christmas and birthday and sends him around there. She is very dismissive and judgemental of me. I thought it could be a cultural difference. I’m mixed race (British) so I am polite with a lot of pleasantries. She is Danish I find her cold, and pessimistic towards everything I say. I don’t bad mouth my partner to his mum, I’m always pretty encouraging and thoughtful about what I say and how I say but everything I say she opposes and say I’m wrong- she ignores my attempts to bond I.e birthday, Christmas and New Years messages. She is very weird, and I can see she isn’t very interested in getting to know me at all. I was making the effort because I think family are important and mine are very different we are close and we joke a lot. My partners are cold and distant they have very little to say apart from drink and smoke. Anyways background over. When she found out she messaged me and I thanked her and said naturally I feel nervous but excited. She then said I need to get over myself and what will he will be. I chose to ignore that message and just carry on. She then apologised and being the person I am I accepted and moved on - she wanted to know more so I told her we are finding the sex out she really went to town saying why do I need to know and I should just be normal and wait- and that once know I’ll worry about other things. The saddest part she doesn’t even know me and hasn’t seen me since I’ve been pregnant. It’s so upsetting. I don’t have a lot of money and I found out more for practicality than having to know. I’m buying second hand stuff online - I just wanted to buy things right. I was just trying to cover the sad financial fact up and just make it seem a sweet milestone but instead she saw it in that way. Then after we find out my partners like my mum was right we shouldn’t have found out. I’ve lost interest and excitement. 💔I’m not even a mum yet and I’m messing up. Felt like I needed to share this. Hopefully you ladies are experiencing a more joyful time.