This might get a little long, but bare with me.

I’m 18, and have been dating my boyfriend for 2 and a half years.

Around December of last year, my boyfriend began to bring up threesomes with another girl (no names, just kind of like the faceless stranger type thing...)

I always said no. He pressured me for months and wore me down. I never gave in, but it absolutely destroyed my self esteem.

I’m not good enough for him. He’ll never be happy with me.

I would cry and beg for him not to bring it up, but he was so selfish and would keep going.

In April, I left him. I told him he was an asshole and needed to get his act together.

He messaged me almost every day asking for me back. A month later we met up, talked and decided to work things out. I said if he ever brought it up, I’d break up with him. The damage he did was horrible. We had a very honest conversation about that month and admitted we slept with other people, and I asked him to be honest with me and I would feel better if he had gotten it out of his system.

He said he hadn’t had a threesome, and have no doubt he’s telling the truth.

This was all 6 months ago now since we got back together. Contrary to popular belief, this ex did change! The 360 turn in attitude has blown me away. On a daily basis he showers me with love and compliments, we go out and have lots of fun and I KNOW he loves me through and through.

But I still have so much anxiety surrounding threesomes. As I typed that, my heart just started pounding and I teared up

We’ll watch a movie and a threesome scene will come on, I’ll legitimately start sobbing on the spot and need him to come and console me. I just feel like I’ll never be good enough, or I’m disappointing to him. I’ve expressed how I feel and he always reassures me I’m more than enough for him...but I don’t know what to do

I told him he ruined any chance of us ever being comfortable enough to do that.

I love him so much, and he’s done everything in his power to redeem himself...I just dont know what to do