Pregnant and alone....

I’m very happy and grateful to be blessed with a baby. However this is not how I wanted it to be. I was with him for 2 in a half years we then broke up but we were still having sex. In August I found out I was pregnant. I’m now 12 weeks and 4 days. I loved him so much and I truly thought that our paths would cross again at some point. When I told him I was pregnant he told me to get an abortion. He said that if I did he’d get back together with me and we would get married and have kids the right way. I didn’t agree with it so he stopped talking to me and said he didn’t want anything to do with me or the baby. I send him ultrasounds and updates not that he cares. He hasn’t told his family or friends. My gender reveal is coming up and as I see all of these videos and pictures of couples finding out their babies genders it makes me happy for them but tbh I just wish it was me. I wish I had some one to share the excitement with and have support. But I don’t. I don’t have friends so I don’t have anyone to get out of the house with. I feel like since I’m pregnant it’s taboo to say that depressed that I’m so damn depressed I can’t get out of bed I barley eat. I just wish things were different. I just want to be happy. I would give anything to be happy. I don’t want people to think I’m a bad mom I just don’t know how to cope