If you had a vaginal birth how is your vagina??

S

I have been avoiding look6to closely at mine. I had a perennial tear and some internal muscles also tore. I had a look when I had stiches and that was about it I was too afraid. During sex my vagina feels open so I'm doing crazy kegals. But the outside opening is fucking ragged looking. I mean if I bend over I can see inside!! Is this normal??? Its a huge opening now omg I'm calling bullshit on the whole the vagina streches and goes back to normal shit....

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