Husband helping friend do her taxes?

My husband had an old coworker who was fired over the summer but the two remain close buds. I’ve met her, she’s incredibly sweet, down to earth and always makes me laugh.

She asked my husband to help her with her taxes in March. My son will be 3 months old then. She lives 45 min away from where we are. My husband said yes because she is a friend and he thinks he should help her. She is unfortunately unbelievably clueless on how to handle her money. Her place is filled with beautiful things that I’ve only seen my in-laws own. And my husband makes 3x the amount she does.

I just feel a bit annoyed my husband agreed to help her with her taxes without telling me first. He is aware we will have our first child... she lives 45 min away, her parents are a walking distance from her... I don’t understand. She has an on and off bf but I think she doesn’t trust him to help her.

First, if she payed my husband I wouldn’t care. But she should’ve thought of other options first besides from the man who has a wife and baby at home and lives far away, don’t you think?

I’m annoyed he that he doesn’t get it... I get he wants to be nice but can’t she at least have asked anyone else or offer to pay him?

Update:

It’s very hard for me to write out my thoughts on Glow, I should have added a few things before people jumped my throat.

The reason why I wrote this is because for the past three months, my husband has been home only twice a week. He works in another city so his work has been footing the bill for his hotel stays. (It’s election year in our little country. Very busy time).

My husband is a people pleaser... I was only frustrated about his colleague asking him for help because she knows the stress he has been under this election year. But instead of asking someone who isn’t about to collapse, she asks my husband who already has so much on his plate.

I just would like my husband to set boundaries for himself because what happens is, he will help and help and help everyone (except me because I’m an adult) until he ultimately burns out and I take the hit. I have to pick up the pieces of what these people take from him and try to get him back on his feet. I explained to him that he needs to set boundaries. The reason why I brought up my child is because I worry he won’t set these boundaries for himself, burn out and then not want to spend time with his new family because he is too exhausted helping out people who have other means of helping themselves out (friends who live closer, outside help, parents).

I love that he enjoys helping people, I do to, the difference is (which I have explained to him) is that I know where my breaking point is. I know that if I tried to push past my breaking point of helping people, the ones who I love most will be the ones who I hurt in the long run because I would be burned out. So I pace myself and prioritize who needs help and I logically plan it out. I tend to help the homeless and shelter animals out the most than people who have more options of finding better help than just me. And I will tell my friends that, if they ask me first because I know they have people who can help them out better than I can. Unless of course, they are mentally ill, which I know first hand is not something a friend should ignore.

I just can’t help but get frustrated because my husband and I know how lazy she is. I mean, for goodness sake, she was fired from her old job because of her lazy work ethic! But my husband told me that she trusts him not to say anything because she hasn’t been paying her taxes (shes 33) and she has accumulated so much debt that she feels embarrassed. I called her last night to see if she would like to do her taxes at our place and I will cook her dinner and she can spend the night in our spare bedroom. She said yes, so we’re going to make a little fun evening out of doing her crazy taxes :p

I also want to apologize to the people who were triggered or offended when I mentioned his colleagues spending habits. I had no idea people would take such offense to that, I was only trying to build a little background on how careless she can be. I know it’s not my business what she does with her money but she chose to include my husband in on her finances, which of course, I will hear about. Not just from him but from her as well. She’ll call me and complain about how she has no money while she is out buying name brand clothes and furniture. So yeah, I’m going to give a little attitude because I know her and I know what she does with her money.

I also feel, as his wife that I need to protect my husband from himself sometimes. His friends don’t care that he has been working day and night and that he has a baby on the way. I’m not going to apologize for taking care of him and my future family. I need to make sure my husband stays mentally healthy so he can at least enjoy our baby when he comes.