Prayers...

I posted a couple weeks ago that I was diagnosed with VCI & although I’m hopeful, and have faith God will bring this Second little rainbow to my arms safe + sound.. I can’t help but worry. I’m so nervous to even buy anything. I’m 20w today & haven’t bought but 1 thing. My doctor isn’t too concerned with checking on little babe as much as I am & that worries me as well. I can’t help but wonder. When I found out I was pregnant, it was a complete shock, was not trying nor really wanting. I had a miscarriage at 18, then my rainbow son at 20, and three more miscarriages after him. Now this baby. I wasn’t very happy, I honestly considered not keeping the pregnancy, but I prayed about it and said if God wants me to have this baby, who am I to stand in the way, esp when my losses hurt so much, but I said this baby will make it if gof willing and I didn’t miscarry, but I’m scared that I may have jinxed myself from not wanting baby at first (even though in my heart I did) I know I sound crazy, but I’m so nervous. I am so scared of stillbirth 😩 I just want this baby to come into this world, healthy, happy and for a long time. If you would, will you please pray for us. We’d really appreciate it. Sorry for the rant 🥺