So some background before I get into the situation. My husband and I and our 2 young sons are living with my parents and sister until we save up for a house. My husband works a job where he is usually gone 3 weeks of weekdays out of the month and then is back for 1. And during his work weeks he usually works 70-80 hour weeks. Now that it's getting into the colder months, he isnt working but saved up some pto so were not completely losing income. I work full time and the kids are in full time in daycare. My parents are aware that my husband usually doesnt get paid when hes not working. For the last 2 weeks he hasnt been working because he requested a week off for the first week because he had to go out of state for a funeral and then that week fell so that there wasnt a job the 2nd week. My husband hasnt really been looking for a side job even though I made it very clear he needed to find something because they dont get any work in december. And I get guilted every time I ask because he gets defensive whenever I ask about how the job search has been going. So he isnt currently working and probably wont get anything for the rest of the year except for maybe 1 short job but we are still paying $330 a week in childcare because unless we fully pull them out of care we still have to pay. While I'm at work apparently he plays on his computer all day or sleeps after the kids and I leave because he stays up late playing video games.

So yesterday night, my mom brings up that she wants us to do dinner on mondays and wednesdays. I am fine with cooking on set days but my sister and I always have plans together on mondays to do board games with our group of friends so it would mean we would be late for the plans and I would have to rush around after work. My husband was out of the room and my parents asked why my husband couldnt cook and my dad made a comment about how all my husband does is sit around all day anyways. My dad also was upset that one day that I came home i had to take the dogs out immediately after getting home because they were acting like they had to potty urgently while my husband claimed he had taken them out a couple hours before I got home.

Ive been kind of upset with him to begin with because it feels like I'm doing the majority of the chores and taking care of the kids. I never get a break really and he frequently gets to sleep in and do his own thing and now that his jobs are slow he isnt contributing financially and we are paying $330 a week for childcare while he sits around.

The situation yesterday was extremely embarrassing for me because its family making comments about my husband acting lazy. My husband has a great deal of respect for my dad and he would be crushed if he knew how my dad viewed him. It feels like my family think I'm a pushover because I do so much in comparison to my husband. I honestly dont know what to feel or do anymore.