Ultrasound appt

All week the number one thing on my to do list has been to schedule my ultrasound appointment and I keep not doing it. Then 8pm will come and I’m like tomorrow is the day! And let me tell ya tomorrow is never the day. It just hit me that I’m terrified and avoiding it. The last ultrasound I had was in March to tell me I needed a d&c and had had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks. So I’m truly petrified of the ultrasounds. I associate them so negatively now and I just don’t want one. I know I need to and I’ll suck it but I’m glad I realized why I’m not doing it. Maybe my husband will call lmao