Clingy ex wife?

So I've been dating this guys for 6ish month. We made it official after 3 months. Hes gettin a divorce. They separated a over year ago and were "disconnected" for awhile before that so he says. Anyways they're still friends which I was fine with at 1st. No kids involved, just cats lol I started sleeping over after we made it official here and there. His ex comes over to visit the cats!!! She walks right in unannounced, uses her house key, checks the mail because she hasnt switched her address. All odd to me...OH AND she still has all her social media names still has her married name while posting pictures of her and her boyfriend. I started gettin uncomfortable with it because the last time I stayed the night he left for work the next day and let me sleep. I wake up to her and her boyfriend(this is the guy she cheated on him with) in the kitchen making coffee!!! I left. Now this is just messed up. I told him I dont think I can do this, I'm not down with being friends with his ex and her boyfriend...he got mad at her and told her she needs to ask him if it's ok to go there now. And ends up loosing her shit because she doesnt want her "daughters" the cats 🙄 to forget her. She then msgs me to say I cant be there on Fridays because that's her day off to see her KIDS lol so me and him argued about how weird this is and I left. I'm not about to share a man who's ex is walkin in and out as she pleases and tries to tell me when I cant be there. I tried to tell him she still has a hold on him but he doesnt see it. Alot of her stuff is still there and she tried to plan a gathering at his house with their friends and asked if I could not be there. Couple weeks passed and he told me shes not comfortable with me there until the divorce is finalized 😂 soo petty me goes there on a Friday, I got into some lingerie and a silky robe and waited for someone to walk in LOL sure enough her and her boyfriend walked in and she left super red. He calls me a few minutes later laughing. I said if you want me to be your girlfriend, you have to pick who you want happy. Me or your wife 🤦‍♀️ sounds horrible I know.

I know there could've been a better way to set boundries but I've always been a little extra 🙃