Is she a toxic mom?

My mom constantly makes plans with me and my two girls (her grandchildren) and then always backs out at the last minute or makes up some excuse. And that’s fine but it makes me mad because I constantly rearrange my plans to fit hers she made with us.. Then when I get upset and say something to her she says such hateful things. It’s one thing if she says hateful things about me to me but when she tells my husband hateful things, it pushes me over the edge. She will send me hateful messages telling me I think I’m better than her, and thank god I moved away or I’ll be trailer trash just like her. It’s like she tries to hatefully guilt trip me. She asks what I want from her.. when all I want is time. Time with your daughter and time with your grandchildren.. is that too much to ask? I’m guessing so. Then she tells me to be a “grown woman because that’s what I wanted to be.” I’m 22 years old 😐 too grown to have a mother? Idk. She then tells me she’s not the mother I want her to be. I’m about to the point of cutting off my mom. Am I wrong? Is she toxic? It hurts my feelings because all I’ve ever wanted was a mom that was there and meant what she said.