What they DONT tell you about sleepless nights

When we were pregnant everyone would joke around like “I hope you’re ready for screaming, crying sleepless nights. Feeding in the middle of the night and not going back to sleep”

No one told me that my baby would be sleeping through the night by two weeks, giving us the impression that we were soooooo lucky...

And then three weeks later, he’s up half the night, not screaming, but trying to play

And then tonight, wakes up to feed, falls right asleep after, I go to put him in the bassinet and he’s wide awake.

OKAY SIR, let’s get you down because it’s 4am and mama is tired.

I rock him

Walk him around the house

Swaddle him

Sing to him

No eye contact

Back in bed

His eyes are finally starting to get heavy, okay, back to the bassinet; I put my hand under him ANNNNNNND THERES POOP ALL UP HIS BACK, ON MY CLEAN SHEETS AND COMFORTER.

So now he’s wide awake again; he’s been up now for an hour now; I have to wake my husband to help clean up 🙄

We get him cleaned up, and now I’m trying to get him settled down for bed again; swaying, rocking, walking around...aaaaaand HE SPITS UP ALL DOWN MY CLOTHES💀💀

I get myself cleaned up...get the baby; back to bed, I’m trying to rock him, soothe him, get him drowsy enough to go back in the bassinet again; aaaaaand he poops. Again.

breastfeeding SUCKS

he woke up two hours ago to eat

I’ve been through two outfits, three diapers and bedclothes in that time. I JUST got him kind of down for bed again.

Anyone need me to come talk to a high school health class on the importance of birth control? 😂