Baby fever?

Question

Has anyone else had overwhelming baby fever? Or is that just me? I’m in my late teens and I’ve been thinking a lot about pregnancy. Is that a bad thing or good? When I was 13 I did have a miscarriage, probably because of age, and that stuck to me for years. Now I’m thinking if I had a baby, things will get better. I’m financially ready for one and living in a safe household. I talk about it with my boyfriend and he seems to be iffy about it since it is a scary topic. I don’t wanna keep pushing it on him but I do want one but I don’t know if I should or not.

Answer

I’m 21 in a couple days.. and just last year.. meaning when I was 19 lol, I was desperately wanting to get pregnant. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years and I’d always bring it up. He’d tell me he did want a baby with me but not yet and it would upset me. 
We sat down with my brother and his girlfriend one day along with my younger siblings, and we started talking about houses and traveling. 
He started talking about how rn he’s working super hard to raid his credit score and help me raise mine too so that one day in the meet future.. and these are his exact words “we can buy some property, sit down with you babe and design our own home. Build it together. Enjoyed our home just us to for a little bit. Maybe do some traveling in between.. and start our family” 
Since then.. baby fever? Gone. 
I’ve been saving money. Working to get credit with him. 
We are currently finishing off our planning for our first big trip.. we’re going to Hawaii in a couple months and I couldn’t be any more excited! This summer we also will be going to Disney!!(he’s never been) 
We both have stable jobs, we both have a stable home(not together) but we both do. We both have supportive families that ALSO want a grand baby. But I’m not ready like I thought I was. I want to finish school, build my home with the man I love, travel and explore the world with him before we have to settle and turn out priorities around to be solely for the baby. 
No baby from us in the next 5 years or so. 
At least that’s the plan.
It’s so easy to say “I’m ready and financially stable” 
But are you really? 
You’re young! Do you for some time, with your boyfriend. Do things together and get stable TOGETHER. 
Ya woman have that clock, where we don’t want it to be to late and have a baby when we’re old.. 
But men think about if they have enough to offer you and a baby? Are they able to take care of you and a baby, alone. 
Because if the baby comes, and they can’t do it.. what happens then.. 
arguing about money problems, about who’s going to watch the baby, about wanting to go out and do fun stuff because its your 21st birthday and you want to celebrate with your s/o and friends but you have mommy/daddy duties that come first. 
Some people can do it, us woman are strong and can take on the mom roll fast. But think about the baby. 
How the baby’s living situation will be like. You’re not even married, I know marriage doesn’t stop the man from walking off but y’all are young. 
He’s not ready, so don’t push him. 
Because if you push it on him and you get pregnant without him anting it or being ready for it.. and he walks off on you and the baby, you’re going to hate him for it. 
And I get that, I would too. 
But.. I don’t know, there’s a lot to think about. 
It’s not just having a baby to cuddle every night and game cute pictures with.

Answer

I’m 26. When I was your age I was dying to have babies!!! 
I wanted them sooooo bad! 
I’m glad I waited to have them. 
I waited until I had my bachelors and we owned our own home. 
If your boyfriend is iffy. Then wait until he will be as excited as you about it! Nothing is worse than when the dad isn’t as happy about it. 
Good luck! You know your life best! Make it a good one!

Answer

Sweetie you have time you are still a teenager. Yes it’s a scary topic especially for men. I too have had 2 miscarriages at 4.5 and 2.5 months along. I never wanted kids. I raised other people’s kids since I was 8 as a mother helper and nanny and my own nephew and took in foster kids etc. I was told when I was 20 that either I or a child would not survive so I put it in my mind that I didn’t want to put myself through that. But when I lost Katie and the other baby, I’d be open to kids or someone that cane with kids. The guy I’m dating now has a 23 year old and 2 teenage kids. And had a vasectomy years ago. And I’m fine with that. I’m 41 if kids happen they happen if they don’t that’s ok too same goes with marriage. I’m not in any rush for anything. Things that are rushed usually ends up biting you in the rear. My brother and his ex wife had a save the marriage baby and he ended up blind and autistic. I had to raise him. My adopted brother was a safe the marriage baby that didn’t and she hated and resented him and treated him like crap and abused him and we ended up with him at 13. There is a time and a place for everything in life. Enjoy life. Finish college. Find your purpose. Get a good job. Travel and do things you’ve always wanted to do before kids while life isn’t complicated. Knock out your bucket list now not when you are 60 after your husband has died and the kids are out of the house. Nothing is guaranteed in life. There’s so many women on here that gets cheated on while pregnant or after having kids. It feels like it’s every other story. I wouldn’t pressure your guy or let this be the wedge that comes between you. Take Life as it comes. I wish you luck.

Baby fever?

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