Is it possible to baby my lo too much?

Question

I know that may sound ridiculous but now I’m overthinking what my friend said to me. I havent left my lo with anyone but my fiancé. Even with him, she’ll cry the entire time I’m gone so now I dontw ant to leave her anymore. My first girls night out I went home early cuz my fiancé texted me saying our daughter wouldn’t stop crying. My friend said that I am “babying” her too much. I mean shes only 2 months old 🙄🤦🏼‍♀️ Her daughter has gone over to her moms place 2 times, sometimes even 3 times a week since she’s been a couple weeks old. Personally I’m not comfortable with doing that and I did tell her that but she said her daughter doesn’t have separation anxiety and that I’ll cause this with mine if I don’t start leaving her with other people. I guess I’m just looking for reassurance that just because I don’t leave my baby with other people and not even that often with my so, that she won’t have separation anxiety?

Answer

I don’t want it to sound rude, but yes she probably will have separation anxiety. But if she gets used to being with someone other then you then she’ll be okay..... Obviously if you fee it’s to early then just do it later on but if you were to have her stay, for example, with dad let’s say 30m-1 hour randomly in the week, she’ll understand that mom, of course, comes back home to her. 
Both my kids started sleeping over with family at 2 months old (that’s when they started sleeping 8-10 hours at night) so they have never had issues with us leaving them anywhere....

Answer

I wouldn't say you're babying her, but I do agree that getting her used to being away from you is a good idea. Just for short times. I have left my baby 3 times (he's 3 months old), twice with my husband for a couple hours each time and once with my in-laws for a couple hours. Before that I only "left" him with my husband when I would walk the dog for maybe 10 minutes and he would cry the whole time because he was so attached to me over everyone else. Now he's gotten much better and "forgets" about me after a little while when I leave. He'll cry at first but can then be distracted and will stop. I do think it's good for him to he able to be away from me and I do think it helps to start it when they're young in small increments. 
I also feel like it was a big confidence boost for my husband. He is so helpful when I'm there, but he questioned his ability and would always ask for my help a lot even when he had things under control (he didn't have any baby experience). He first time he was so excited he took care of him completely on his own, so the second time he was way more confident when I left and he didn't have to text me any questions while I was gone. I love that he wants to be a hands on dad and he even told me hates when people say that dads "babysit", they're just being a parent. I'm left with our son all the time, he feels like he should take turns occasionally.

Answer

I don’t think it’s a problem not to leave her with other people. It’s all about what makes you comfortable. I do think its important (even if she cries) to leave her with her dad. That’s an amazing bond that needs to form there too!

Answer

I don’t think your babying her, but I think in the next few weeks is when they start not liking strangers.  I feel your better off getting her used to her dad and close relatives sooner than later.
I haven’t left my 11 week old overnight with anyone (he does NOT sleep through the night 😒) but my mom and mother in let law have spent a lot of time with him. Maybe try letting them hold baby while you’re there before leaving her with them. Good luck!

Answer

I can count on 1 hand the number of times I've left my 19mo woth someone other than my husband.    The 3mo has never stayed away from me.

Answer

If you don’t feel comfortable yet then I wouldn’t do it. Babies are all so different and it’s easy to blame later behavior on some parenting styles when in reality it could just be their personality. My first let anyone hold him and was always excited about the attention from strangers lol. However once he started daycare he hated it, it was a struggle every single time literally until he started kindergarten at 5 years old. My second didn’t let anyone hold her except daddy and me. Even with me she was reluctant - daddy’s girl. When it was time for her to start daycare I was all anxious but she loved it. She never cried at drop off and always had a good time - no problems whatsoever with other people taking care of her. 
Number three for some reason I was way more uhm “babying” with her, maybe because I thought it was our last, last time for me to get all those baby cuddles? Who knows. I barely ever let anyone hold her. She was always with mommy. Now she is 3 and a total social butterfly. She stays at daycare without a fuss and is excited about new people. Not clingy with me at all.
We will see how our newest addition turns out but my bottom line is - do what makes you comfortable. I don’t think you’re damaging her with some extra love 🙂
Real quick: have you watched daddy with baby, does he hold her differently maybe? Our baby only really likes to be held in one certain way. She used to scream with her daddy a lot too until I showed him how I hold her and now they are fine.

Is it possible to baby my lo too much?

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