Never enough

My husband has acted like he totally hates me for a while now. He text me while he was at work one day and told me I needed to get my hair done (he never lets me spend money so I just put it off). So I made the appointment and went and got my hair done. It turned out AMAZING! When I got home from my appointment and picking up our kids my husband took one look at me and had a look of disgust on his face and said I looked like my aunt (my aunt is stunning) I said thank you and he said it wasn’t a complement. I just blew him off. Yesterday I spent the whole day cleaning while he sat in our bedroom watching tv. I went in there and turned the light on in the sitting room part of the master suit for my daughter. He lost his damn mind. He stood up and like came at me like he was going to hit me. I grew up with physically abusive parents for the first 13 years of my life before they dropped me off at my grandmas and never came back. The abuse was so bad my mom caused permanent hearing loss and my dad would routinely pin me to the floor or a wall by my throat. So I flinched he ended up just sitting back down and a little later he apologized. This morning I was getting ready to go to church. I got up at 5:30 with my three year old got her breakfast and sitting down with her color books. I fed our baby and pumped breastmilk for her. Then I made myself some coffee got in the shower then did my hair and make up. After I got ready I went back into my bedroom to wake up my husband to get ready well he was already awake and messing around on his phone. He took one look at me and said “why did you do that with your hair?” (I literally just straightened it) I told him I wanted to and he said I was just waisting time when I could be cleaning. I cleaned the day before. I looked at him kind of shocked and he told me that our house is a fucking mess. I’m about to go to church with the kids alone and just never come back. I hate it here, I can tell that he’s really impacting me because I am so angry all the time. I need to get out. NOW.