Anyone have any advice for one or both of your significant other parents not liking you? (We live with his parents to save up for a house)

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 8 years and I know for a fact his mother despises me. She puts on a front to tolerate me at family functions but as soon as we are behind doors it’s a completely different story.

Anytime her and her son are in a fight and I get brought up she refers to me as ‘the girlfriend’ or ‘her’ instead of using my name. And when I asked to do my own laundry she scoffed at me and claimed ‘it’s my washer and dryer. I would NEVER ask you to do my laundry if I were in your position’ but then all she does is bitch and complain about having to do my laundry.

I also don’t eat their food (I’m vegetarian and his mom does the grocery shopping) and she almost intentionally buys stuff with meat in them. And there’s no room in the fridge or pantry for if I want to buy my own food. His dad told her to clear out space on a shelf and a spot in the freezer and she looked at him and went ‘well why would I want to do that?’ But I’m essentially eating out every night and bringing it home.

And when we talk about our future his dad is so excited to hear about the wedding and babies but the look on his moms face is like she’s trying to use the force to strangle me.

Please help before I say something rude to her and finally stand my ground.

**PS I get it’s her house and I should respect her but the whole reason I moved in was my stepdad is very toxic and abusive and needed to get out of that environment for the sake of my mental health**