Would this bother you?

Question

My sil has 4 kids, ages 8-13.  I have two kids, 4m old and 20 month old.  Every time we are at a family party, and they want to do something with my kids, they always ask their mom or my mil.  And they answer on my behalf! For example, 
Niece- (to my sil) can the baby have ice cream? 
Sil- of course he can 
Niece- (to my MIL about my 4m old when she was a newborn) can I hold the baby? 
MIL- sure 
Another time, my niece was pushing my son in his stroller in the backyard.  I wanted to pick him up and she goes, “sorry, but grandma said I’m in charge today” 
This is constant, whenever they want to play with them, wake them up, feed them something like Hello I am the mother! If it’s something I don’t agree with like giving my son ice cream before a year old, I’ll interject and be like UMM NO.  My MIL will respect it if I say no, but my SIL will be like “but why? It’s fine” it drives me crazy.  My nieces are old enough to understand I am the mother I think so I don’t know why they don’t ask me...  and I hate my sil and mil answering on my behalf! 
My husband doesn’t see an issue.  He feels because my SIL and MIL have always been “authority figures” to the other kids, and I’ve only been a mother for 20 months that the kids don’t understand I’m the babies mother (what?!)

Answer

Nope. Not happening. I don’t care how crazy it makes me look but I would interject EVERY single time and say “ask me I’m the mother”. Or “no it’s not ok, and next time ask me as I’m the mother.” And your nieces are trying to tell you what to do??? NOPE. “I don’t need your permission”.

Answer

What the f*** YES!!!! and how Rude/inconsiderate your husband is.. it's your (and his) baby, not theirs. Anything regarding your baby should be taken up with you and not them. It's understanding why the kids might ask them for permission as your husband said. But they need to be redirected to you or your husband. They shouldn't answer.

Answer

Yes it would bother me.  I had something really similar happen at Xmas where I asked MIL to not give my kids soda and she ignored me and my husband said nothing even though he said he agreed they shouldn’t have soda.  So I said until his mother can respect our boundaries she’s  not seeing the kids.  So it’s his responsibility to talk to her.  
They’re disrespecting you either accidentally or intentionally and that shouldn’t be happening.

Answer

You’re being a little dramatic. They are children. Talk the MIL and SIL and say that you would prefer for the children to ask you or the parents can ask you before they do anything with tour kids bc you don’t want them to eat certain foods and whatever else you think. They’re you kids. You can say whatever you feel But be prepared for MIL and SIL to feel some type of way.

Answer

You stand your ground right now!
Contradict ur SIL if needed
If she says ur baby can have ice cream u be quick to say “yes but not today” or smthg like that
If they have an issue with that u tell them u r the mother of ur babies and ur rules go!
My SIL would be the same. My husband gave my 2 year old daughter a lolly and my SIL comes to tell me how bad parenting thet is! Fuck that shit!

Would this bother you?

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