Feeling confused, excited.. worried

I just need a little rant, chat.. and basically some girl chat.

So me and my partner have been trying for a baby for over a year! We’ve had 2 miscarriages, 1 chemical.. I have been totally deflated.. constant blood tests at the doctors, seeing my next set of options for us to get pregnant. After months of crying.. stress.. we decided to just put a stop to all the trying and just focus on us, we starting talking about a different future. A future we’re we just work hard.. travel the world and enjoy being best friends and lovers all in one. I finally FINALLY got over trying to get pregnant and starting looking forward to our new future. Last week we decided to buy a puppy ( our fur baby) just so we felt and heard them tiny foot prints on the floor. Then a couple of days later my period didn’t come, tested.. got a mega and I mean mega positive ( I’ll post a picture) obviously I was so excited to see them two pink lines, but then for some reason pure fear and panicked set in. Is this going to be like all the others? Am I going to have heart break all over again? And I feel like I’m just not attached to this pregnancy? If that makes sence? I feel so ashamed because we tried for over a year... a year of heart break and now I’ve finally got those two lines I feel... annoyed? Like why? Why has this happened now? I finally got over it all.. moved on.. planned out our new future and road we wanted to follow.. now I have 2 lines and a very naughty puppy!🤦🏽‍♀️🥺 I’ve spoken to my partner and he is happy that were pregnant.. but for some reason.. I don’t feel so happy 🥺😞 is this wrong to feel? I’m sorry for a long one girls and I’m not sure of anyone is going to read this.. I just needed to tell someone how I’m really feeling 😞