I am torn.. change my life due to mental health or keep pushing?

Question

I’m in the military and going through a lot of mental health stuff.. I won’t go into detail but it’s bad enough to where I could get out early if I fight for it. 
Now I love my job and serving my country. I have been well taken care of but I am all alone while dealing with a lot of mental health issues. I have no friends or family any where near me. 90% of the time I want out. I’m done and just want to go back home and just go to college and do what I’m doing here but in the civilian world. I’m basically a danger to myself and being sent to programs to try and help me but nothing is working. 
On the other hand there’s 10% of me that thinks I’m going to regret getting out. I worked my ass off to get this far and I will feel like a failure. I am good at what I do, I originally wanted to do 20 years in. I am proud to wear my uniform. This is what I’ve always wanted. 
My head is very foggy right now with everything I am dealing with. I know no one can make this decision for me but I wish I could see a sign on what to do or get some clarity.

Answer

Listen. I say this as a mental health professional and an army wife...you probably need to get out.
I don’t have enough details to give a super solid opinion, but the military isn’t a place to be when your mental health isn’t solid. I know that is an incredibly hard decision to make though. My husband has been on the fence many of times. Just think about the worst case military scenario. Could you currently handle being in the midst of it? Could you carry out your duties to the best of your capability? If you can’t, that’s not okay and it isn’t safe for anyone.
If it’s anxiety, I would say definitely get out. Any personality disorder should probably disqualify you from being in anyway, so that checks that box. Depression is tricky. Some people have a bout of depression and then never experience it again. However, I would still probably get out, as being susceptible to depression isn’t a good thing in the military either.
Wishing you the best and hoping you get through this and come out feeling better. ❤️

Answer

Definitely take time to talk to a therapist on base if you have one. There are many opportunities in the military to seek mental help. If that doesn’t seem to help, then absolutely, you should get out and move home. 
Maybe you would feel better if you were able to make some friends where you’re stationed. Or if Family came to visit. If you’ve tried everything to make yourself feel better at your current station but just don’t, it’s time to call it quits. 
Military life is very hard. For a LOT of people, it’s not easy being away from family and friends whom you’ve grown up with. Moving away the first time made me SUPER depressed. Our FDS was in CA, we’re from FL. And no one would visit, and I never left the house. But once I was able to make a friend and find time to spend with her and find hobbies I enjoyed, it got so much better. 
Good luck hun!
❤️

I am torn.. change my life due to mental health or keep pushing?

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