I’m a terrible person

I need to vent...

Let’s take it back to the beginning of December. My husbands friend got fired from his job which ultimately ended up making him lose his apartment. We didn’t know the severity or the situation but he came to us one day and told us he’s been sleeping in his car. Me- “Well shit, we have an extra room, don’t sleep in your car, it’s freezing! You can stay with us for as long as you need...”

Now, I know what you’re thinking. That’s where you f’d up kid.. 🤷🏻‍♀️lol.

But he’s different. He has a kid, he wants his own place. He just needs a month or two to get back on his feet. He said he’d be out in less than a month.

Well, fast forward to February... he’s still here, still only doing Lyft, barely making any money. (He leases his car from Lyft, so idk how much he really makes because most of it goes to his car payment).

End of February; He finally gets a callback from a job. He’s supposed to start training in the next week or so. Me- “Awesome! Maybe he’ll be out by April.” He goes to his first day and comes back feeling optimistic. They’re figuring out the scheduling but they’ll be starting officially in mid March.. “cool!”

March 10th comes around and, 👋🏼 ( that’s a slap in the face) Here comes the coronavirus. He gets an email saying they’re postponing the start date until further notice. Me- “FML.” Then schools are cancelled. “FML.” He went from barely being home, to being home ALL THE TIME, bringing his kid over every day, taking up my kitchen, taking up my living room.. taking over my life. He got a cold and blows his nose and then doesn’t wash his hands and touches everything. (Meanwhile, my anxiety is so high just from the coronavirus existing and now my home that is supposed to be my safe haven, isn’t). I vent to my husband and all he says is, what do you want me to do? Throw him out? “no... but fuuuudge, can he find another place to stay, for a week or two?” I’ve been TTC since January after miscarrying last March, and we’ve had no luck. We have to be quiet when we’re having sex and can’t do it when we want. (it’s a small house). It’s just not as comfortable, you know? I just want my house back, and it’s probably not going to happen until everything opens up again, which may be months! We’re not rich! Yes, we’re better off than he is but we need help too.. we’re drowning in debt and this virus isn’t helping us either. Idk what to do. I’m losing my patience. I just want my house back. And a baby... 😩😩

Ok, end rant.

Posting anonymously because I don’t want to embarrass anyone, i just really needed to vent.

❤️

stay safe and stay healthy my friends.