Knowing my boyfriend watches certain pornstars

So, before everyone starts attacking me, I know porn is normal. I know it's heavily normalized. I'm a super monogamous person, not just physically, but mentally as well. I don't look at other men in that way, I don't watch porn, because I find everyone else's dick and body besides my boyfriend's, disgusting frankly. I struggle with major self esteem issues, depression, and anxiety. I'm working on that with my therapist. I know there's insecurity going on there.

I just feel so sad and hurt that he jacks off to specific women. He'll type in a name to watch her, and imagine having sex with her. Am I supposed to just be like "that's great, keep doing what you're doing!"? Just thinking about him doing that hurts a lot. I wonder if he imagines someone else while having sex with me. Or if he looks at my nudes and then goes to watch the pornstars to actually get off. I know this is the cliché insecure partner, I just want advice and tips on how to overcome it. I kind of find it ridiculous that I have to overcome it at the same time, though. Like no, I don't want my boyfriend jacking off to other women lol. I don't get off from other men, or imagine having sex with them. For me, it's all about him, he's the only one I want to think of that way, sexually and romantically. I've tried watching porn, I still don't really get off on it because it's not my boyfriend. We exchange nudes and that's what gets me going, is HIS body.

We've been together for 2 1/2 years, and he is pretty selfish in bed, which I've talked to him about. He's also not that great at pleasing me, even when I show him. Porn is filled with fake things and I'm pretty sure he thinks I could orgasm with penetration alone lol. Sex is mainly all about him, which we're trying to work on. We're long distance right now though, but still have sexy talk and nudes exchanged.

I know I'm not alone in feeling like this, and I know there are going to be a lot of people that just say get over it. But I literally have a mental issue telling me I'm not good enough and all that other good stuff. How do you ladies cope or ignore or just don't care about your partners getting off to other people?