Emotional Maturity

Please...WHEN AM I GONNA GET THERE?!! Like, I can’t deal with these stupid thoughts about my boyfriend cheating on me or me feeling urked when he find another female attractive anymore!!!

I. Hate. Hormones.

Why do I feel TOTALLY fine one week like yeah go talk to yo guy friends and stuff then the next I’m feeling so salty and hurt like “plz don’t leave🥺” man I’m such a crybaby.

Anyways... I need some help please. I want to be emotionally mature. I always find myself thinking about him and his ex more than he does himself..or so he tells me. This is my first relationship. It’s just WILD to think he’s been in love with someone else, seen someone else in that way and done passionate things with them. I wish I could understand but I can’t, and I feel like a crybaby that brings down our relationship when I get in these moods. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be able to feel that way, since I’d always be a love-virgin and he always will have “experience”

I feel so lost in the world of love.

Thank you venting gods for letting me blow up this post with my thoughts. 🙏